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History of the decade, part 4: 2003 

October: Arnold Schwarzenegger travels to Sacramento to attend the première of Terminator III, only to find himself stuck at the Governor’s mansion. He has been trapped there since.

Yesterday: 2002


Colin Powell says Iraqi WMDs are threats to global security, but fails to convince other Security Council members except the UK because they did not like Microsoft Powerpoint. This sparked the development of Open Office.
   Hu Jintao becomes the president of Communist China, giving rise to jokes in the White House about ‘Hu is the president of China?’ and other fun quips between Bush and Cheney.
   SARS becomes a trendy illness, and even becomes available in canned form in Australia.

Photographed by Michael Spencer/
   The US and UK go in to Iraq after being tipped off that there was new software there that was better than Microsoft Powerpoint. They believe they find it in the first few weeks, leading President Bush to declare ‘Mission accomplished.’ However, when the software is brought back to the US, it is found that it is only compatible with the Apple II.
   President Qaddafi of Libya admits that his country was to blame for the Lockerbie bombing and the two terrorists in Back to the Future. As a sign of good faith that he did not want Doc Brown’s plutonium back, he announces he will give up his weapons’ programme.
   In a return goodwill gesture, Great Britain says it would end the series Crossroads, after killing off both Benny and Diane.
   Arnold Schwarzenegger accepts an invitation to what he believed was the Sacramento première of Terminator III, only to find himself trapped at the Governor’s mansion. Barred from returning to Hollywood, he decides to do the Governor’s job anyway, calling his Democratic opponents ‘girly men’. Ted Kennedy shows up, but is unable to get his nephew-in-law to stop quoting from his movies.
   UN votes to stop Israel from erecting a border between itself and the Palestinian areas, after China says it was bad feng shui.
   Saddam Hussein finds that his doubles have disappeared, and that his disguise as a Baghdad cab driver has failed him. This leads to US networks wondering whether Queer Eye for the Straight Guy should be revived as a concept, with Saddam Hussein as the first aired subject. A lessy bushy makeover is done by Carson Kressley for Saddam’s trial, and the show becomes a hit.

Later today, as a Christmas special: 2004

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Entries from 2006 to the end of 2009 were done on the Blogger service. As of January 1, 2010, this blog has shifted to a Wordpress installation, with the latest posts here.
   With Blogger ceasing to support FTP publishing on May 1, I have decided to turn these older pages in to an archive, so you will no longer be able to enter comments. However, you can comment on entries posted after January 1, 2010.

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